I want to share my JEMCA with you, five ways of self care that have improved my quality of life. I hope that you will find them helpful as well.
This is my third step of self-care, and the M to my JEMCA. No, it is not ‘mum’, we are talking ‘manifesting’. If you thought JEMCA is something you cook with, why not start at the beginning.
I have a weird habit (yes, just one). At the start of every new calendar year, I like to pay close attention to my very first thought. Usually, it is something I wish for. I may still end up swamped with anxiety for the rest of the year, but that very first moment is all mine.
What is accompanying my one weird habit is a process I am a little more serious about, writing a list of all the things I choose to manifest in that brand new year. A summary of how I like my life to turn out. (Mainly because I had to find something to replace the wish lists I used to write to Santa). I found one of these lists that I wrote at the end of 2014 the other day.
What I wrote at the end of 2014 turned out to be a very rough outline of what 2015 actually looked like for me. With the exception that I would have never been able to imagine how perfectly every little detail actually unfolded. I’d like to give you an idea of what my life looked like at the end of 2014: I needed my relationship to be more than it could be. I needed it to fill an emptiness inside of me and relied on it to make me happy, without knowing how to take care of myself or how to create my own happiness. I was living an unhealthy lifestyle, without consistent exercise or a nurturing diet. I felt lonely and was craving real connections.
Looking back on this now, I noticed two things that helped me manifest (or be so accurate with predicting my year ahead). You could also call it, manifesting for the absolute beginner I was and, most likely, still am.
I focused on things that were in my control, changes in my own behaviour that I knew would create more happiness for myself. Which of course created less resistance than trying to manifest a bunch of money in my bank account.
I was as precise as I could be, about what I wanted, not about how I would get there.
I did not focus on manifesting a ton of money into my life, or my dream job or career. That is where the law of attraction becomes most attractive for most people, but none of these things were what I truly wanted back then. I craved genuine connections, with myself first, and with others. I wanted to spend an amazing holiday with my partner in Europe. That is exactly what I got.
The law of attraction, manifesting the life you desire, working towards finding the results you desire, all these concepts are making it easier for us to grasp the underlying process. ‘Manifesting’ is the idea that works for me, but for you, it might be something else. The underlying principle that I believe in, sounds like this:
A positive attitude will attract more positivity into your life.
If you manage to maintain a positive attitude for most of your time, you are likely to live a happier life, which will in turn bring more good things into your life. If you are not sold, think of what we call ‘Murphy’s Law’: when one thing goes wrong, we expect the next thing to go wrong as well, and once we expect it to go wrong, it usually does. (Think Yhprum’s Law instead. A bit harder to pronounce, but worth the effort.)
“The reason you want every single thing that you want, is because you think you will feel really good when you get there. But, if you don’t feel really good on your way to there, you can’t get there. You have to be satisfied with what-is while you’re reaching for more.”— Abraham Hicks
Once we know what it is that we want to attract into our life we need to find positivity about it. But too often, when we think about what we really urgently WANT, we create the opposite. We might compare ourselves to others who have what we want, and we feel discouraged because we do not have what we think we deserve. Does that sound very positive to you?
Of course it is not easy to be positive about something that we think we need, in order to be happy, or just really want to experience, which is where manifesting becomes helpful. We use the present tense, to create affirmation about anything that we wish to manifest.
I have true friends who motivate and support me.
I am in a relationship that is balanced, and based on trust and honesty.
I love my job.
By using positive affirmation, we can speak the things we desire into existence. At the very least, which forms the beginning of this process, we shift our attention to what we truly want, and once we do so, we are likely to realise the steps we need to take to get there.
Fake it ‘til you make it.
You might think you are speaking a lie, but if we were to change our affirmation to ‘ I WANT TO love my job’, all we do is match the frequency of wanting, not the frequency of allowing it, or actually having it in our life. If what we say does not feel true just yet, but we say it repeatedly, we give ourselves the chance to become so uncomfortable with repeating a lie, that we work on changing our reality to match our vision.
We ensure that our frequency matches what we desire in life. Or if that does not resonate with you, we begin to focus on our desires and let our beautiful brain do it’s job: find solutions.
“Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality.” — Bashar
Do you believe in the law of attraction? Do you call it manifesting, or something else? The real question here is, are you the creator of your own life, or is it Aunty Mary? Do you believe you have no control over what comes next, or do you believe that you can speak things into existence that only existed in your mind before?
I believe that all of us can manifest, and that we use the concept all the time. It really is all around us. We created supermarkets that provide us with all that we need for our daily life, in one place. That was once not more than an idea. We are able to manifest the life we desire. We are the creators.
This is my current list for Santa:
I can structure my time freely, and spend most of my time tending to the important task there is, to become the best version of myself.
My blog and my words inspire others to work towards the best version of themselves.
I work from home, or from wherever I am.
I practise Yoga daily.
I follow a vegan and cruelty-free diet that keeps me so full of energy that I feel like bouncing off the walls all the time, unless I choose to be still.
I sit in stillness, every day, for at least a few moments.
I feel strong and lean. I exercise regularly, without feeling the need to take my exercise or my diet to any extreme.